Did you know all along that this is where I would be:
sitting on a secondhand couch in a half-darkened room
with laptop and glass of a crisp Oregon Pinot Gris
writing poems after singing the kid's bedtime songs
and closing his door behind me? Did you know a year ago
as the new moon approached that I was steeling myself
to admit unhappiness I'd never been able to speak?
Did you know I wouldn't be renewing those vows again --
instead I'd be disentangling from the fine knotted threads
of the household, of the narrative, of the future I used
to think was a given? Did you know, and if I'd been able
somehow to hear the words would you have told me then
that I would be here now, buffeted sometimes by grief
but able to trust that the tempests will someday recede,
that I will find my way to calm waters, to a new shore?
I'm participating again this year in #blogElul, an internet-wide carnival of themed posts aimed at waking the heart and soul before the Days of Awe. (Organized by Ima Bima.) Read #blogElul posts via the Elul tag; you might also enjoy my collection of Elul poems which arose out of #blogElul a few years ago, now available in print and e-book form as See Me: Elul poems.